Arsenal’s ‘STAN’ [Eminem parody]

This is a parody of Eminem’s music track ‘Stan’, which, if anyone has worked out already, refers to Arsenal’s new chairman Stan Kroenke. Enjoy.

Lyrics written by Steve Wellman

Leagues gone cold, I wonder why, I got out of bed at all

Barcelona at Nou Camp, with our backs against the wall

But even when we thought it was gonna be our day, Robin kicked the ball away

But we could be Spurs so it’s not so bad, it’s not so bad.

Dear Fans,

You wrote so I came a calling

To help stop the club from stumbling and falling

I’ve been here for a few years now, sat up on the board

Watched how the teams progressed and how to strike a chord

But now its time to finally show my hand, to go forward

But anyways, stuff it, what’s been up, how’s the supporters

Bet most of you’ve been here as long as your fathers

Along with your mothers, your sons and your daughters

That’s what it is, what it is to be a Gooner

I read about this Russian dude, who is trying to muscle in on the action, too

I know you probably hear this every day, but I’m your biggest fan

and I won’t let the club get ruined by the Russian man

I’ve got some teams back in the US of A

So I know all about this sports stuff, hey

Anyway, I’m on your side man, hit me back

Just to chat, truly yours, your biggest fan

This is Stan.

Leagues gone cold, I wonder why, I got out of bed at all

Barcelona at Nou Camp, with our backs against the wall

But even when we thought it was gonna be our day, Robin kicked the ball away

But we could be Spurs so it’s not so bad, it’s not so bad.

Dear Fans,

The Russian dudes hanging on, he won’t sell his shares

I ain’t mad, but I am the only one who truly cares

I was at the game on Sunday watching from the stands

I wanted to feel what its like to be a fan

I could see the frustration, and man it shows

How far your passion and support goes

All the players out there, I can see they’re your idols

I want to feel all of that, feel it all like you do

I want to help the Gunners grow

Back to the top; see that’s where we belong

These last 6 seasons have been far too long

I want this club to be noticed out in the big wide world

I want this club and its voice out there to be heard

When I see Arsenal, I see a great world-class club

When I see Arsenal fans, I see the way all fans should be

Believe in the team, its targets and goals

Sometimes I see why your heart often bleeds

I hope I’m the one YOU feel the clubs needs

See everything the fans say is real and I respect that cos you tell it

I want to help to run the club 24/7, I don’t know Arsenal like you, no-one does

I don’t know what it was like as a Gooner to growing up

I’m gonna try to make Arsenal the club that never lose

Sincerely Yours Stan

PS: We can work this out together too.

Leagues gone cold, I wonder why, I got out of bed at all

Barcelona at Nou Camp, with our backs against the wall

But even when we thought it was gonna be our day, Robin kicked the ball away

But we could be Spurs so it’s not so bad, it’s not so bad.

Dear Stan,

Remember this club has a history and an ethos too

We don’t want to end up like the club to the south in blue

With an owner with too much money and all that

Who’ll get bored and run off when its turns flat, we wanna be top cat

See, we’ve been here along time, years

We’ve been through all the heartbreak and the cheers

We want someone who believes in the club too

Who’s not around for a bit, just to make a buck or two

We’ve got some issues Stan that really need sorting

To help us stay on top and keep fighting

The last few seasons have been a bit rough

And some of the results have been a bit tough

We need someone fresh, someone with vision

To help us see it through all the season

I hope you believe in the Arsenal way too

Cos if you do we will all put our faith in you

If you look at the club we have a philosophy

We all stand together, “VICTORY THROUGH HARMONY”

I know sometimes we say some crazy sh#t

But that’s cos we care, we believe, we live for this

A few years ago we were the ‘Invincibles’

Now, we need to get back to those principles

We all hope that you are the one, you’re the man

We now put our faith in you…Stan

The Fans.

[bet_365 type=’generic’ size=’468′ af_code=’365_061433′]

Like what you read? Then follow me on Twitter – http://twitter.com/wellmington

Visit and Join our Facebook page, click HERE to do so.

Gunnersphere is currently looking for new writers to join the squad. Contact via twitter or at Gunnersphere@snack-media.com for further details.